508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
Me. You. Shitty green clothes from Savers that we will dub alligator costumes. Middle of the quad tomorrow at noon. Bring your alligator voice and the pearls before swine comic.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
He motorboated me, gave me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
