Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
you poured 3 beers into an empty vase and then passed out, so i drank them for you. don't say i'm not a good friend.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
This makes me appreciate being single with no prospects.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I'm sorry you're hurting. Would a picture or my erect penis help?
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
Randomize
