i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Randomize
