Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
I'm half bulimic - I binge but forget to purge
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
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