shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
can you come get me and bring me shorts and a shirt
maybe shoes and water too
oh and maybe a noose to hang myself
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
Just zoned back in to real life and found myself chanting "noodle eater noodle eater noodle eater" at my parrot as he devoured a single macaroni
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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