Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
this lesbian fantasy crush is getting WAY out of hand. just spent an entire meeting staring at her long fingers thinking, "oh those could be fun"
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
