Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
