Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
He won't leave and I need to take a shit and vomit, quite possibly at the same time.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Randomize
