I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
We got three kegs and a backhoe. Now taking bets on what charges we end up getting arrested for. Will need bail money.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Randomize
