Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
was it more than 30 minutes?
then you're in a relationship
i literally laid in bad for an hour last night thinking of what i'm going to name my cats when i become a cat lady.
The 21 Worst Ways People Have Been Dumped
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Tinkerbell just flew up to me and tickled my balls. What the fuck did we smoke?
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
19 People Confess The Worst Things They Have Been Accused Of
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh