He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Wasn't a date. In exchange for artichoke dip I received a bj. And sex. It was a transaction.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I need a straight guy to pretend to be my boyfriend for 30 minutes so that I can pull off an act of petty vengeance. Interested?
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
I know him enough to fuck him but not enough to give him advice.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
