I'm chasing vodka with french fries.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
I remember tearing his shower curtain down but I don't remember trying to shave my vag...
It's like she can't drink without using a flambongo
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Randomize