we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
As she was leaving she said "You have an awesome penis, I hope to use it again soon" I need that on a business card to hand out at the bar
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Randomize
