Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
i used baking grease as lip gloss
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
YALL MOTHERFUCKERS WANNA WATCH HEAVY METAL AND SMOKE WEED AND PLAY POOL AND DRINK BEER AND SMOKE WEED
My dad is clearly baked off his ass. He almost sat on moms cat in front of her, zoned out while staring at it and said he wondered what it was thinking about. Now he's dragging everything from the livingroom into the garage. Moms not happy.
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