I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
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