Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Nothing ruins an orgasm faster than accidentally calling out his boss's name
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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