as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
I just pooped in his toilet and didn't flush...I desperately need to get him past the girls don't poop phase.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Randomize
