I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
