Umm went to talk to a client ended up seeing his semi erect penis. This is my life.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
Randomize
