Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I think mom knows I'm drunk I put a full blown balloon in the fridge.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
