I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Dude i have a 6th sense for when bagel bites are ready.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Doctor just prescribed me 20mg Ritalin 3 times a day. It's becoming the "grain and oats" section of my food triangle.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I think I may have fully transcended this spectrum of life. I can see beams of light man. Down to the photons
What
The only downside is I can't stop skipping
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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