You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I feel like 20 angels jizzed in my mouth. This cupcake is DELICIOUS!
Randomize
