You really coming over, don't trick.
why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
She said she liked strap-ons.
SHE WAS TALKING ABOUT SHOES, YOU ASSHOLE! YOU'RE THE WORST WINGMAN EVER!
Hey, I'm off work. Wanna take a metric fuckton of adderall, possibly get daydrunk, and get my hair cut?
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Randomize
