If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
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