I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
I haven't been this sober since birth.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Your christmas gifts are already wrapped, how on top of my shit am I?
I'm hungover as fuck and had to break into my own house by throwing a cinder block through my back door at 4am. You're more on top of your shit than me.
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
Apparently when it was last call I jumped up on the bar and told everyone to get the fuck out, which was immediately followed by a round of applause from the bouncers/bartenders and my tab getting paid as well.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
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