Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
Would you judge me if I made John grow a bush while he is in Cancun so he doesn't cheat on me?
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Sometimes i wish my vagina automatically turned itself off when i'm legally drunk.
Randomize
