To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
I know it was you because you're the only person I know who gets drunk and craves soup.
Soup is delicious
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I die here, tell my vagina and my cats that I'm sorry.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize