Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
I knew I had to get an abortion when his toddler sister came up to hug my leg and I kicked her off saying, "Get off, fucker."
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
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I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
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I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
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