so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
Randomize
