Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I'm single as of 11 minutes ago. I was the chick who drunkenly tried to climb into bed with you 2 weeks ago. Wanna make this happen?
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
This weekend i learned three things 1) skittles in vodka is good 2) it takes more than a roll of quarters to get a cab home 3) never tell a bartender to give you your change in actual change
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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