what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
Yeah, first date. First take a pic of him to circulate around for your friends and than have him fill out a short penis questionnaire. Seems completely legit to me.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
