foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
I can't believe just smoked out of a pear
I can't believe you had a pear already made to smoke out of, that was impressive
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
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