That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
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Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
These kids are nice. Shrooms make everything so nice.
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
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Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
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