This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Killed two birds with one stone: found my wallet and unclogged the toilet.
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
I have a plus one for the Blackout Express, should I pen in your name?
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
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