P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
You walked in with a firecracker and a doughnut then demonstrated what a lazy job he did fucking you
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Selling drugs in raindeer antlers is the best way to spread christmas cheer
And for those of you keeping score at home this is the 7th time I've found Casey passed out head first in a bowl of chips at a party I didn't even know she was at
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
I'm both gender and math confused
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Ha. Yeah that's all I found you with this morning. Butt ass naked w my robe across your lap and your arms thrown back in handcuff position.
Randomize
