false alarm. still invincible.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
Why is there ANOTHER stolen fire extinguisher in my room? You know that's a felony right...
She sleeps with her hand around my balls. First I thought it was just a comfort thing. Now I think it's to make sure I can't slip away in the middle of the night.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
Randomize
