Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
