I'll write directions out on a napkin and slip it to him. Then say P.S. The UTI is gone.... that's not creepy at all right?
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Randomize
