Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Randomize
