You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
My inner buddhist recalls, "You receive the d when you aren't looking for it, only when the d wants you." True story.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
burned my penis with a sauteed onion again.
on the bright side i found your panties and the lid to the nutella
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
