She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Randomize