So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Yeah, I fucked him. and the worst part is his name was Jesus. And nobody said it in Spanish. Just Jesus. There is no way I can avoid burning when I walk into a church from now on.
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
she brought her phone charger to the bar this bitch is ready to drink
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