I just saw a commercial that said "call your doctor if erections last more than 4 hours". I said "disgusting" and my mom said "I know, i hate when that happens." Get me out of here.
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
Holy shit, just saw a girl in the library smoking a bong disguised as a calculator
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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