he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
What's the best way to tell someone that I accidentally wound up in a gay harem?
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Randomize
