whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
Just almost drowned myself in the shower again. I need an adult.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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