But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Just faked two orgasms bc I had too much wine and remembered mid sex that I bought doritos yesterday.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
I AM NOT THE MAN IN THIS RELATIONSHIP.
It's shit like this that makes people think we're gay.
I have a surprise for you guys
What is it?
A MOTHER FUCKING SURPRISE DON'T ASK QUESTIONS
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
I JUST BROKE A NAIL MASTURBATING. WTF I could even enjoy my orgasm bc now I'm gonna have to spend $50 on my nails.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
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