I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
If you were awake I would probably ride my bike over, fuck you like a god, leave you in the wonders of life, and bike home
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
Fair warning birthday party last night avoid kitchen & upstairs bathroom if you value your remaining sanity
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
Randomize
