does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
We are going to the humane society and getting you microchipped so you don't get lost on your birthday. Either that or your getting a child leash
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
