put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
the bruise you left on my ass looks like africa. the other just looks like a hand.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
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