community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
I've had cake for breakfast the past 3 days. You tell me how bikini season is going.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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