ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
Hey man sorry I got all grabby
We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I am so horny I keep driving over the rumble strips... best half hour ever.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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